Weep With Those Who Weep
For joy comes in the mourning.
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Question: How can we respond to the suffering of others?
I’m spending this weekend at a funeral - my second of the year.
For some, this is nothing, they are in a season where funerals are as common as baby showers and birthday parties. For others, two in six months is a lot. I am currently in the latter camp.
As I sit with family in the midst of grieving, I go onto Instagram for a brief escape. The first three posts I see are of a friend’s cancer diagnosis, another friend’s miscarriage and then an image of injured children in Gaza. I close the app. I cry.
In moments like these, I am often left wondering what to do. What do you say to someone who just lost the most important person in their life? How do you support someone in the midst of a life altering diagnosis? What do you do about global injustice, pain and suffering?
As I ask myself these questions, I am reminded of Romans 12:15:
Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.
In other translations, it’s also mourn with those who mourn or grieve with those who grieve.
In the midst of the brokenness of the world, one of the most powerful things we can do is weep with those who weep.
I’ve always been a feeler. So much so that I get teased for crying at Disney movies or seeing a three-legged puppy limp at a dog park. When the tears inevitably come, I’ve sometimes gotten push back. “What will crying do to change the situation? Isn’t that a bit unnecessary? Can’t you just get it together and move on?”
But tears are a gift. One we underutilize.
When we cry, not only is it cathartic, but it paves the way for greater empathy. Our hearts soften and we are reminded that the world is not yet as it should be.
In his book, The Gift of Tears, Corey Russel says that:
“The tears born of God, move God.”
Tears born of God include a lot of things but there is something significant about crying with those in the midst of their suffering.
We see this in John 11 when Jesus weeps over the death of his friend Lazarus. Before He raises him from the dead and there is joy, He weeps. He cries with Lazarus’ friends and family and those in the community that showed up.
When I first moved to LA, I lived in a neighborhood with some gun violence. Police helicopters and Citizen App alerts became the norm. One night, as I was walking back from parking my car, I saw my neighbor’s apartment overflowing with people. The door was wide open and dozens were streaming in and out as I heard a faint wailing. When I asked what was going on in broken Spanish, I learned that one of the neighborhood boys had been shot and the community had gathered to mourn. All around me were grown men and women crying and holding one another. I stayed to cry with them. Even though I had never met the boy or his family, the ache of loss was tangible in the air. In moments like these, what is there to do but weep?
Thankfully, when we weep over the injustice and suffering of the world around us, it actually does something. It’s not a waste of time or water. It can change history.
Like when a mother’s tears prompted Jesus to raise a small boy from the dead or when Hezekiah’s weeping changed God’s mind and he lived another 15 years. Tears move the heart of God.
When we witness the suffering of others and don’t know what to do, there is an invitation to weep, knowing our tears reach the God who sees and hears and moves on our behalf.
Although, I understand if some have reservations to this. Does weeping excuse us from taking action? Or will constantly crying for others and absorbing their pain overwhelm us to the point of despair?
These are valid reservations but when we weep with those who weep, we accept the Lord’s invitation to let our hearts break for what breaks His. From this place, we are able to act with greater empathy and compassion. We partner with Him in bringing Kingdom come.
And as we shed tears for the suffering, pain, and injustice of the world, we can know that, “those who sow in tears, shall reap with shouts of joy” (psalm 126:5). This is a promise, one we can cling to. Weeping won’t last forever but joy comes in the mourning.
So as I sit with my family in the midst of mourning and I look upon what is happening all over the world, I know a day of joy will come but for now, I cry. I grieve with those who are grieving. In doing so, I can be confidant that it reaches the heart of the God who sees and hears and is weeping alongside me. Tears born of God, move God.
Prompts For Further Processing:
For those that want to spend a little more time with this.
As you sit with all of this, you might feel a bit heavy. That's okay. If that's the case, give yourself the space to let whatever needs to come up, come up. Let it move through you. Shake it out. Turn on this or this song and dance it out for 5 minutes. Trust me.
Is there anyone in your life grieving or going through a tough situation? It can be difficult to know what to say or how to offer support. Simon Sinek recently highlighted the impact of an eight-minute phone call. During times of struggle, even a brief conversation can make someone feel more supported. While it’s not always sufficient, and it doesn’t mean cutting someone off if they’re opening up, it can help alleviate some of the pressure. We all have eight minutes to spare in our day. What would it look like to reach out to that person who is struggling and schedule an eight minute phone call today?
The next time you are scrolling on social media this week, notice if there are any posts that make you feel sad, powerless, angry, triggered or scared. Take a second to sit with that. Ask yourself, what is it about this post that is making me feel___? Then ask the Lord, what do you have to say about this? Write down the first thing you hear.
I would love to hear from you! Comment below or message me about your experience with the acrostic poem or how all of this sat with you.
Housekeeping
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